


Is My Wizard Pot OSHA-Certified? The Answer May Surprise You!

by DontKillBugs



Series: Duckburg's First Coven [3]
Category: DuckTales (Cartoon 2017)
Genre: F/F, Genderfluid Character, LGBT positivity, Nonbinary Character, Older Characters, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, Witchcraft, fun with potions, pg-13 flirting, pronoun respect, violet is genderfluid, weblena
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-17
Updated: 2019-08-17
Packaged: 2020-09-06 01:27:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20283112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DontKillBugs/pseuds/DontKillBugs
Summary: Lena Vanderquack and V. Sabrewing: Heads of Duckburg's first Coven, and custom potion-brewers for hire. And sometimes, when the talented Queer kids in their coven need help, the two careers cross.Weblena Week 2019, Day Six: Gift





	Is My Wizard Pot OSHA-Certified? The Answer May Surprise You!

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, this one's a little late, but it needed the extra work. Hope you enjoy!

Webby heard her phone _ping_ in her pocket as she shut the front door to 166 Quackenbush Avenue.

_I bet I know who that is,_ she thought as she fished her phone out of her pocket. Seeing the phone's screen, she grinned. The text was from Aasif, Lena's new student, fellow coven member, and increasingly frequent house guest.

_"hey! school just let out. can we still come over?"_

Tongue sticking between her teeth, Webby responded.

_"Sure! Come on over, it's ready!"_

A pause.

_Ping._

_"great! we'll be there soon."_

Tossing her phone onto the couch, Webby quickly strode to the door to the basement. The sign tacked onto it read:

PLEASE KNOCK

MAGIC AND SCIENCE BEYOND  
THIS POINT

Webby knocked three times in rapid succession. From deep in the basement, she heard Lena call "Come in!"

Smiling, Webby flung the door open. "Ding-a-ling!" A sudden, sharp drop into the basement gaped below her, the sort of thing that would catch an unassuming burglar off-guard (assuming one could get past the magical security wards over the house, that is).

There was a crackle in the air as the magic recognized her presence. The stairs began to materialize before her, leading down into the basement, complete with a red-and-gold carpet. Webby bounced down the stairs two-by-two, humming a tune to herself.

As she reached the bottom, she reached a hand out and grabbed the corner where the wall ended, and gently swung herself around the corner into the basement workshop.

Lena and Violet's workshop looked like a wizard's dungeon and a chemistry lab had been smashed together. Two large workbenches had been pushed together, with an indecipherable maze of glass tubes, beakers, and Bunsen Burners tangled around, over, and under the tabletop. It looked like the smallest shake would send it crashing down into a very expensive mess, though Webby knew it could survive an earthquake. Atticus the cat was curled around the base of one of the swirly beakers.

Two of the basement's walls were lined with shelves. One wall was packed tight with various spellbooks, chemistry textbooks, folders, and a few Eldritch tomes written in dead and undead languages. Violet ("_Yep, pink beads," _Webby noted)_, _clung from the top shelf with one hand, her foot three shelves down. She held a book in her other hand, suspended over space.

The other wall was covered in ingredients. A jar filled with shed snakeskin. A oak box, painted black, which contained the only Hand Of Glory Violet could find after much searching. Eyes of newt, wool of bat, all the good ol' classic witchy ingredients.

From her spot at her workbench, Lena lifted her goggles, smiling that radiant smile Webby had fallen in love with. "Hey, Pink!"

The two kissed, a quick smooch. Lena put her goggles back on, returning to the task at hand- grinding something into a paste. "How was lunch?"

Webby nodded, smiling. "Great! We went to that place on Cedar, with the sandwiches?"

Lena glanced over her shoulder. "Vi! Throw me that jar of John The Conqueror root!" Without interrupting her reading, Violet extended two fingers. Across the room, a small jar on the ingredient wall glowed orange, and flung itself across the room, where Lena caught it with ease. She gently shredded a handful into the wizard pot before her, before turning her attention back to Webby. "How are Huey and Gos?"

Webby chuckled. "Smitten, as usual."

"Those two are too gay to function."

Webby bumped her wife's hip. "Remind ya of anyone?"

Lena blushed under her goggles. "You hush."

"Oh! And I told Aasif and Jade to go ahead and come over!"

"Niiiice." Lena poured the paste she had ground into a liquid-filled upside-down cowbell, swishing it around. The combination turned from a magenta to a deep royal purple, steaming gently. Lena poured the mixture into a glass beaker, then held it out to Webby. "Here, try this."

Webby took the beaker and gulped the contents down without hesitating. Swallowing, she waggled her tongue. "Eugh... tastes like chocolate Pepto-Bismol. So what's it supposed to dooooOOOOO-" Webby's eyes widened as her voice deepened. She suddenly began to croon. "-OOO_ooon, and let me play among the stars~"_

Violet called down from atop the bookshelf. "She sounds like Frank Sinatra."

Lena grumbled as she slid her goggles off. "Dang it. Noted." She reached over to a notepad and began to scrawl a correction to the formula. "_Needs... less... purple..." _ Lena snapped her fingers on one hand, and Webby felt a sudden _wumph_ of steam as the potion quickly and painlessly exited through her pores.

From inside the steam cloud, Webby's normal voice spoke out. "So was that wrong?"

Lena nodded. "Yeah. It was supposed to make you sound like Christopher Falcon."

"Is this a fun potion or a commission potion?"

"Commission, if you can believe it. Now I gotta start again..."

Lena clicked off the warmer under her cauldron on the table, and began sorting through ingredients from the box on her left. She grumbled, "Eye of newt... one stick of buttah... milk from a cow that lives in Calcutta..."

Violet hopped down from her spot atop the bookshelf, levitating a stack of books on one finger. "And what did we learn, Lena?"

Lena rolled her eyes, brandishing a half-empty jug of milk. "_Yes_, Vi, thank you so much for making sure I didn't use all the milk the first time."

"Because...?"

Lena's eyes were now in danger of falling backward into her cranium. "Because I do not want to go all the way back to Calcutta for another jug of milk. _Again." _She leaned over the table, toward Atticus. "You're the only one in this coven who's on my level, kitty."

"_Wraow."_

Above them, there was a muffled chime as the doorbell rang. Webby perked up, fanning the steam away from her face. "That's them! I've got it!" She sprinted away, taking the stairs two at a time.

Violet glanced away from her books. "Think they'll like it?"

Lena smirked. "Vi, I _know_ they're gonna like it. I'm good at what I do."

Violet raised a finger. "Also, before I forget, do you have _the thing_ ready for later?"

Lena produced a small vial, filled with a glowing blue liquid. She grinned, swishing the potion gently.

Violet smiled. "She's gonna love it."

From behind them, the sound of multiple pairs of feet clumped their way down the basement stairs. Webby swung around the corner. "Your students are here!"

Aasif glanced around the basement workshop, his eyes wide. "Wow... this is amazing!" Lena smiled inwardly. The young grackle had really started to come out of his shell since joining the coven. He was a lot more open when at 166 Quackenbush Avenue than a lot of other places.

Jade's expression mirrored xir friend's. Jade, a duck with brown feathers and an enormous mass of dark hair, had struck a soft spot with Lena. The young enby was excitable, and prone to happy flaps when something went xir way. Lena glanced down, pleased to see Jade had started wearing shorts more often. Jade had had a long-standing insecurity over xir dual prosthetic legs, but encouragement from Webby, as well as having occasionally joined Webby's daily fitness regimen, had helped Jade to open up.

Lena spun a full 360 degrees on her stool, clapping her hands. "Hey, kids!"

Aasif waved. "Howdy, Lena." He tickled Atticus behind the ear. "Hey there, Atticus Catticus."

Jade gently punched Aasif's arm. "_Dude dude dude I still can't believe we're learning ACTUAL MAGIC from the lead singer of the Nasty Crimeboys I can't believe it I can't!"_

Lena laughed. "Yes, yes, I get it. Remind me, and I'll invite Mr. Dewmsday himself over. He'd love to meet you."

The two young metalhead's eyes grew to the size of plates at the mention of the Nasty Crimeboy's infamous drummer. Before they could geek out, Violet sauntered over. "Alright, alright, before you kids get off-topic, I do want to check. Have you been practicing your cantrips?"

Jade motioned to Aasif, who performed several complicated and jerky hand gestures. With a purple glow, an ethereal hand manifested, and began stroking Atticus, who began purring.

Violet smiled, reaching over and shaking hands with the mage hand. "Nice and solid. Very good, though you're overcomplicating it a little. Just keep in mind, it's witch magic, not anime ninja magic."

Aasif chuckled, rubbing the back of his head. Jade elbowed him. "_You utter weeb."_

Violet pointed gently to Jade. "Your turn."

Jade cracked xir fingers, and planted both palms firmly on the table. Between xir hands, a tiny version of Manny the Headless Manhorse Professor of Chemistry at Duckburg High manifested, and began to roll around bouncily on a large ball.

Lena leaned over to Webby. "Remind me to show that to Uncle Scrooge. He'd get a kick outta that."

Violet snapped her finger approvingly. "Well done! Your illusions are moving a lot more smoothly than they used to."

Jade smiled, nodding. "I've been practicing by making illusions for my little sister. She loves them."

"Great job, both of you," Lena chimed in. "But I think we all know why you're here."

Jade's breath caught in xir throat. Xie had been thinking about this visit all day- all week, even, since xie had had that conversation with Lena.

-.-.-

_"How did you even get into doing potion commissions, Miss Lena?" Jade asked, perched atop a stool._

_Lena gently stirred the contents of the glass bowl before her. "Jade, I told you, just call me Lena or I'll hex you."_

_"Sorry."_

_Lena gently poured the bowl into her Wizard Pot. "It started off as a gag. I made a potion out of Pep that allowed you to float for a couple hours. I put it on ebay as a goof, but then somebody actually bought the dang thing." _

_With a snap of her fingers, Lena dropped a wooden spoon into the Wizard pot, where it began to stir on its own accord. "I shipped it to him with a warning not to drink it outside. I guess he listened, cause he left a 5-Star review. Next thing I know, I've got commissions coming in left and right."_

_Jade swallowed the lump in xir throat. "Can you do anything with potions?"_

_Lena shrugged. "I mean, there is no magic bullet, pun intended. It's like with actual magic, there is no such thing as waving your hands and saying 'Wizzle-dee-doo, you have jaundice now.' Potions are a lot closer to science than magic, even if magic is involved. If someone had a potion in mind, I could probably make it, but it'd have to be tailor-made to the person in question, and that takes trial and error."_

_Jade remained silent. The words sat in xir throat, unable to pop out._

_"So what potion do you have in mind?"_

_Jade looked up. "How did-"_

_Lena smirked. "I know that look, kid. Do you know how many queer kids come to me asking for help with this or that?"_

_"I can guess. I've heard the rumors." Jade swallowed again. "Can you do it?"_

_Lena smiled. "Yes."_

-.-.-

Lena and her students sat around the living room table. Aasif and Jade shifted silently, barely hiding their nerves and eagerness.

Lena gently opened the wooden box placed between them. She first produced a small pouch filled with what looked like dried tea leaves. It looked like little more than a homemade tea bag. She placed it on the table before Aasif.

Aasif stared at it. He had been expecting more somehow. "Is this it?"

Lena nodded. "Not everything's gonna look Hollywood, kid. It'll still work just as well." She leaned forward. "Here's what ya do, so listen up. Take that pouch home and store it somewhere dark, but not pitch black. A nightlight will do. Then, on the next full moon, brew it like tea with some hot water, take it outside into the light of the full moon, and at the stroke of midnight, chug the whole shebang in as few gulps as possible. Look at the moon and thank Selene, she likes to know her chosen are doing okay."

Aasif nodded, writing this whole spiel down. "And then?"

Lena shrugged. "And that's it. That'll align you to the moon's energies. Your voice should adjust over the following day or so, until it's at a level that suits what you want. And you're sure that's the only dysphoria you want help with?"

Aasif nodded. "I want to tackle one thing at a time. I might take you up on that later, but for now this is fine."

Lena nodded. "Cool." She turned to look at Jade. "Are you ready?"

Jade nodded quietly. Lena reached into the box and produced a thin beaker, filled with a neon green liquid. The cork was sealed with wax. "I call this one 'Green with Enby.'"

Jade chuckled. "Nice."

Lena handed the beaker over to the duck's waiting hand. "This one's a bit simpler. Go out to a field during the evening, somewhere you can see the horizon in the west. Watch the sunset, keep a close eye on it. Have that cork off and ready to drink. Now, right before the sun vanishes over the horizon, you'll see a flash of green. That's called Fiddler's Green, and it's the magic released when the sun moves around the Earth. When you see that flash, drink that in exactly four gulps."

"And I'm guessing that'll align me to the sun?"

"Close. It'll align you to the _dusk_. The next time you sleep, it'll be until the next sunset, no matter how long or short that is. A stone will have formed in your mouth, so be sure not to choke on that. Keep it or throw it away, it doesn't matter. The point it, your body will be as you want it to be, excluding anything like horns, fangs, bat wings, etc."

Aasif choked on his coffee. "Wait, you can do that?!"

Lena laughed. "Yes, but don't even think about asking! No hardcore body alteration until you're 18!"

-.-.-

A couple of hours later, Aasif and Jade waved goodbye from the other end of the front walk. "Thank you, Lena!"

Lena waved back with two fingers. "You kids be careful! And follow those potion instructions _exactly!"_

Violet slid past Lena out the front door. "I think I'll head home as well and make dinner. I have a deep, insatiable lust for the world's biggest salad tonight."

Lena hugged her partner. "Seeya, Vi. Be safe."

As Lena shut the front door, Webby came sauntering up to her, a sly grin on her face. She gently wrapped her arms around Lena, lacing her fingers behind her neck. Lena smiled, leaning forward. Their beaks clacked gently as they kissed.

Webby withdrew her hand, revealing the small blue beaker Lena had made. With a cocked eyebrow and a mischievous grin: "What's this?"

With a dramatic sigh, Lena gently headbutted Webby. "How do you always know?"

Webby shrugged. "I was trained by one of the world's top spies, and I know when my wife's cooked something special up."

Lena gently took the beaker from Webby's fingers. "May I?"

"Absolutely!"

Lena gently poured the blue liquid into her mouth. She swished it around, gargled it like mouthwash, then swallowed it.

Webby leaned gently into the hug. "Hmmm. So what did that do?"

Lena smiled. Her teeth had been replaced with incredibly sharp shark teeth.

Webby froze, her mouth open slightly. Lena could see a thin trickle of drool trail from the corner of her mouth. Lena gently ran her tongue over her new fangs. "You like?"

Still wide-eyed, Webby nodded. "Yeah-huh." Her voice trembled as she answered. "How long do they last?"

Lena leaned forward, and whispered in Webby's ear. "How long do you _want_ them to last?"

Webby finally broke. She swooped Lena into a bridal carry, and sprinted for the stairs. A cackling Lena held on for dear life as Webby galloped for the bedroom. Webby grinned at the love of her life. "This one darn well better be a keeper!"


End file.
